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Representing the People of Maryland, Virginia and
the District of Columbia—One At A Time

Domestic Relations/Family Law

Even the most amicable of separations is an extremely stressful event. The less amicable it is, the more likely that good judgment will be altered. When the time comes that you need legal assistance, you will want someone who will not only fight for you and protect your interests, but will help you keep things in perspective. If you are fighting about material things, remember that it's just "stuff." Do not use your children as a weapon against one another. Don't let feelings of guilt or unworthiness cause you to make concessions that are not in your best long-term interest. Some of these statements may seem self-evident, especially if you're reading them in a period of calm reflection. In the middle of emotional turmoil, they may take on a completely different meaning and serve to steady you, helping you focus on what is genuinely important to you.

Here are a few often-asked questions...

Q.	Do I need to have "grounds" for divorce?
A.	Yes, but the grounds can be as simple as separation for a period of time. If the separation is "mutual and voluntary," that is, both parties agreed to separate, that period is six months in the District of Columbia, a year in Maryland, and a year in Virginia (six months if there are no children and there is a written Property Settlement Agreement). Even if only one party wanted the separation, a complaint for divorce can be filed after a year in the District and in Virginia, two years in Maryland. This is what is commonly referred to as "no-fault" grounds, for obvious reasons. No-fault grounds for divorce are the only ones recognized in the District of Columbia. Fault grounds include desertion and adultery. There is no minimum time required before you may file for divorce on these grounds. However, because you must prove fault grounds at a formal hearing, it is a more time-consuming, expensive and emotionally draining way to proceed. Please note that adultery is extremely difficult to prove in court.
Q.	Do we need a written separation agreement to prove when we were separated?
A.	No written agreement is necessary. All you need to do is to be living separate and apart without cohabitation for the requisite amount of time. You allege the date of separation in the complaint, and if the grounds are uncontested, your spouse will agree with the date you have alleged.
Q.	Will I have to pay/be able to receive alimony forever?
A.	Most likely not. In these enlightened times, alimony (also known as spousal support) is considered rehabilitative, not punitive. Maryland and now Virginia recognize spousal support as a temporary measure to help the receiving spouse become economically self-sufficient. Among the factors the court considers are the length of the marriage, the amount of education or training the spouse has, what additional amount of education or training will be necessary to get that spouse back into the work force. Only the District of Columbia recognizes the possibility of permanent alimony.
Q.	What is joint custody? Does it mean the child spends six months a year with each parent?
A.	Joint legal custody is simply the recognition of the courts that both parents want to be involved in their children's lives and are entitled to participate in important decisions involving their children. It does not necessarily mean six months on, six months off. Think what havoc that would create with the child's schooling unless both parents lived in the same school district. One parent or the other may have primary physical custody of the child or children, with the other parent having visitation rights that are either agreed upon by the parties or ordered by the judge. This usually involves one or two weekends a month, alternating major holidays and several weeks in the summer, but can be any arrangement that is mutually satisfactory. Of course, if six months on, six months off is a workable arrangement for you, then by all means do it.
Q.	I am a career military person. Is my spouse of a few years entitled to half my military pension if we divorce?
A.	No. There is a formula that is used to determine the percentage of military retirement pay that a divorced non-military spouse is entitled to. We divide the number of years of concurrent marriage and military service by the number of years of military service, and express that result as a percentage. We divide that in half. That amount is the percentage to be received by the nonmilitary spouse. For instance, if a couple was married for 10 years during one spouse's 25 year military career, we divide 10 by 25 and get 40%. Cutting that in half means that the nonmilitary spouse will receive 20% of the retirement pay.

One thing to keep in mind is that you are better off coming to an agreement on all issues if you possibly can. Trials are always unpredictable, for one thing. For another, it means that some stranger in a black robe is going to be making critical decisions about your personal and family life. Always ask yourself, "is that what I want?" There will be times when a trial is the only way to resolve difficult issues. I am here for you, to negotiate as much as possible, to go to trial as necessary.

If you require additional assistance, or have other questions, please contact me and I will be glad to assist you.